SUBJECT:I call shenanigans on you!
You don't belong here? "I'm stubborn, willful, wily, overeager, passionate, perverse and independent. I am oftentimes skeptical, but I am never jaded. I have a big heart, a merciless logic, a sharp wit and a strong compulsion to fight for what's fair. I was born at the right time in the wrong generation. I stay awake too late because I believe that nothing ever gets solved in your sleep. I suffer from wanderlust."
Clearly you are Chicago. In fact, that sounds like this generation's Carl Sandburg!
It would be nice to be this generation's Sandburg, but I don't think the Chicago of today can even come close to matching the badassery of his Chicago. In fact, I'm willing to bet that if Sandburg were alive to see what this city has become, he would catch a cab to Addison & Clark, get off at the corner and just start punching. He'd be throwing haymakers left and right and slowly, methodically work his way south to Rush Street before hopping the Blue Line over to Wicker Park to wreak further havoc.
I like that mental image quite a bit. But even with the rampant douchebaggery in this city, I still think it is one of kind and could collectively kick the ass of any other city out there.
But I am still going to visualize Sandburg throwing haymakers left and right as he makes his way south. That man would definitely hate popped collars.
'Tis a truly magnificent city that can both nurture and abide the hideous Wrath of Sandburg.