Worst. Guest List. Ever.

The following is an IM conversation between Justin Velander Holt & Kyle Ramos.

March 18, 2009 (2:50 p.m.):
Velander: Okay.
I'm going to say something.
'Cause it's ON MY MIND!
Kyle: DO IT
Velander: And I just need to just get it out.
Kyle: just tell me when so it doesn't get in my eyes
Velander: I REALLY, REALLY WANT TO SEE TILDA AND ASK HER TO ACCOMPANY ME TO JOSHUA JAMES TOMORROW!
She's just SO FUCKING COOL!
I will NOT!
I will NOT!
But I WANT TO SOOOOOOOOOOOO BAD!
Kyle: DO NOT
ask penny!
Penny would like that!
Velander: Penny's gone for Spring Break.
Kyle: man wtf
kit?
Velander: Denver
Hahaha. Kit?! I can't fly her out for a concert! I can't afford that!
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
SERIOUSLY!
Kyle: do not do it
Velander: OH! OH! OH!
I got it!
I know WHO!
Kyle: who?
Velander: VERONICA! [Ed. note: Justin's ex-girlfriend.]
Kyle: yes
YES
AND MAEVE [Ed. note: Another of Justin's exes.]
Velander: I'll stop by her apartment TONIGHT!
At about 3 a.m.!
Kyle: and CHLOE ANNE [Ed. note: Kyle's ex.]
Velander: YES!
CHLOE!
I haven't talked to CHLOE in, like, A YEAR
And her new HUSBAND!
YES!
Kyle: yes!
Velander: THANK YOU, KYLE!
Kyle: good ideas!
Velander: WAIT, WAIT!
That's A LOT of guests.
I need someone to co-host!
KYLE!
COME!
Veronica, Maeve, Chloe, Marcus, Kyle & Justin!
OH. MY. GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!
That would be EPIC!
Kyle: throw zoe [Ed. note: Another of Kyle's exes.] in for good measure
Velander: DONE!
DONE!
DONE!
Kyle: I would hang myself