tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7769532320935507001.post6255557426298349921..comments2022-01-28T11:06:50.045-08:00Comments on Life of Velander: Time & Perspective: A Lettervelanderhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05524860552315414600noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7769532320935507001.post-37911170742271946522012-12-03T22:08:14.054-08:002012-12-03T22:08:14.054-08:00Melissa,
A month ago I wrote you a letter and dro...Melissa,<br /><br />A month ago I wrote you a letter and dropped it off at your parent's house. I sent it to your (old?) e-mail address as well. I would have sent it to your Facebook account, too, but I didn't think you were on the site. (One of my well-meaning friends alerted me to the fact that you were just yesterday.)<br /><br />I've been wrestling all day long with whether or not I should attempt contacting you here. Chances are you did receive the letter in some capacity and have chosen not to respond, which I understand and fully accept. Still, it is *very* important to me that I do everything I possibly can -- within reason, of course -- to ensure that you receive it. Considering the state of things, this is the only way I know how to make peace with you -- or, more likely, the memory of you -- which might someday allow me to wholly make peace with myself. Please believe that I do not make this decision lightly. It's just . . . there are a handful of important people in my life who will never be able to say what they need to to that special someone they've lost, and so I say what I need to *to you* with that in mind.<br /><br />Now that I know without a doubt that this message is going *directly* to you, I consider the task finished and will not bother you any further.<br /><br />Truly,<br />JVH<br />2012/11/09velanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05524860552315414600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7769532320935507001.post-41825218196522764692012-10-10T14:11:51.068-07:002012-10-10T14:11:51.068-07:001.) I'm lamenting my own behavior, especially ...1.) I'm lamenting my own behavior, especially toward the end. Whether or not we would've worked is irrelevant at this point. I'm simply looking for closure. Whether or not she responds, this letter helps me find it.<br /><br />2.) I don't necessarily equate reconciliation with a relationship. Simply, I love Melissa and still believe we could have something meaningful. That could mean anything for us. But seeing as there is no "us", I'm choosing not to speculate on what could be any further.<br /><br />3.) My last four years haven't been a waste, and I find it insulting that you would say such a thing. Kell was an amazing girlfriend who loved and accepted me for who I am. Beth did the same -- and was an even better match. I wasn't longing to be with Melissa when I was with them, nor were they standing in her shadow. As I mentioned in the letter, Melissa became the watermark for future relationships -- not the be all, end all. And thanks to Kell and Beth, the bar has been raised even higher.<br /><br />4.) I don't sleep with "every pussy I see", and I certainly do my damnedest to establish real heart-felt connections. I find these assumptions of yours to be incredibly tedious because they couldn't be farther off the mark. If you were really my friend, you would understand this at the very least. And if you're just an anonymous know-it-all who thinks they've got me all figured out, I will politely ask you to stop reading and responding further to my blog.velanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05524860552315414600noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7769532320935507001.post-41282737555240932992012-10-10T13:43:13.219-07:002012-10-10T13:43:13.219-07:00Jesus man move on! Heart break sucks but it happen...Jesus man move on! Heart break sucks but it happens. You move on, you meet new people and you find something bigger and better. Don't sit around lamenting about something that didn't work. You've wasted four years doing that. Its not going to be easy, but you have to do it. Stop sleeping with every pussy you see and make real heart felt connections. You can be happy again if you let yourself. But you will never find anything if you dont let yourself. Hell youre so hungup on this gal if she came back you still wouldnt be happy because you're holding onto something that isnt real, memories youre making out to be better that they probably actually were because you've lost them. We all do it, and we all let go and move on, so do your self a favor and be happy.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7769532320935507001.post-28761317296400751342012-10-07T17:27:27.711-07:002012-10-07T17:27:27.711-07:00E.,
I wrote a letter to Melissa. I dropped it off...E.,<br /><br />I wrote a letter to Melissa. I dropped it off as well as sent it to the only e-mail address I have. She doesn't have to respond, but I would like to ensure that she gets it. So I'm writing you.<br /><br />If you could forward the link, it would be much appreciated. I know that's asking a lot . . . but you're the only one I can reach out to and still maintain a respectful distance.<br /><br />I hope this message finds you in good health and good spirits.<br /><br />Thank you.<br /><br />JVH<br /><br />============================<br /><br />Hi Justin,<br /><br />I cannot help you. It would not be ethical of me considering her choice to cut off communication with you. <br /><br />If it is meant to be, it will be. Your message will reach her on its own and she will respond if she is moved to do so.<br /><br />I respectfully ask that you do not put me in this position again. I am not an emissary for you or an intermediary between you. I don't know you.<br /><br />That being said, I empathize with your feelings. I am not being hard-hearted towards you, just loyal to one of my closest and oldest friends.<br /><br />I sincerely wish you well on your journey to wholeness, and love, with or without Melissa.<br /><br />e.<br /><br />============================<br /><br />E.,<br /><br />I understand. And you're right, so I apologize. I won't bother you again.<br /><br />Thank you for the kind words. Empathy seems to be in short supply these days, so it is appreciated.<br /><br />JVH<br /><br />velanderhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05524860552315414600noreply@blogger.com